I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
