so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
he had hair everywhere except his balls
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Randomize
