I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
