Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Randomize
