she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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