She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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