I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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