That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Randomize
