I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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