Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Randomize
