According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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