I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
