and my herpes radar will keep us safe
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Randomize
