im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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