it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
