There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
