Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
foreskin is a definite game changer
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
