whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
