Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
