ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
