my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
