They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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