he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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