I got chris browned last night
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
