She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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