Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
