I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
we're so committed to being not committed
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize
