We're facebook friends in real life
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
You have to summon your inner elephant
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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