It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
