Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
