i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
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