IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
