There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize