Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize