I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
They left me at home... I'm a liability
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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