Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Even my vagina gasped.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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