Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Randomize
