He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize
