your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
