Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I licked your asshole in confidence.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize