Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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