All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
we should paint friendship bongs
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