im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Screwed.edu
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
