I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
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