Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Randomize
