i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
