We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Randomize
