like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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