our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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