GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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